Legally Me

Hey Diary

It's been while when I reconciled myself to write merely not as compulsion but as irrevocable and irresistible happy will to share you something more freely. What am I taking? To whom you are talking?? Huh!! Yeah You are right It's "Legally me" Bam!! I know.

Something which I always wanted to vent out and alas here comes the moment. The path is so straight and clear. You got to just move on. I have been thinking that why do we make this so hard on our self ?

There is a word self-respect and I have so respect for it, yeah! I mean it really. It comes only when you know that you just did it all awesome. It comes when you been working with all interest and with clarity, sincerely with taking bit of intermittent break to freshen up the mind or recharging it in all gaudiness. Then, in evening you take the snack or something then hurray in joy you enjoy. Watch some stuff to motivate yourself, or even write or analysis yourself. The day conclude with your uncanny smile and hum some serenade something which love doing or mimics some old proverb of movie like of Al Pacino's "Glory! Glory! hallelujah!" or even sound of music or soft kitty or chanda mama!! then you rest for the new day to come soon. So, you go to bed early.

You realise that you are in jaunty and jelly. Ah! what a paradise. So many stuffs running in your mind, the paramount thing is to get all together in right direction in right path. Empty your mind to begin new journey of knowledge. Can't take anything for granted, not at all. Keep reminding of me yeah I got just one life, I have to make it more substantial, embellish with all needs, fruitful and loving.

Revamped Confidence

Hi Diary

Photo courtesy: Pierig Gallou

Common man! You got gut. You can be the one. You have that charisma, the charm, the curiosity and the whole package. The act of diffidence have degrading impact on the human life. Remember one thing, the only reason why you are shaken up or down and insipid enough to not to retract back is your deep sense of humanity, a benevolent heart, respect for the human. This is rare now days.

Then the time comes when you can't look yourself up. You simply loose yourself. You are compromising soul a sacrificing soul and a murderer of inner self. A grave felony you have committed. You don't even to introspect for some time because you have lost the string of sagaciousness which was holding you all together until you started sitting idle and nothing about your compromising problem.

Being idle, taking break or living the life of hermit is good for some time, It get some time to think over your inner self. It is important to come back and retort. That confidence can only come when human have lost all his desire and is conscious about self. This trait make him stoic has great wall of China.

The shyness and insecurity can be eliminated when you face the world. That's my atta boy! You have the thought and you can entangle them with your talk. This has long term good impact on the life as you start becoming more verbatim. You will know where to start and where to end.

Have faith in your self. The lost charisma of child can be revived. It's never too late. Sometime Ignorance is a bliss but also sometime you ought to be face to face with shining face smiling with full flow and congratulating the inner self, yeah I exist and I stand for myself in this world, then do whatsoever you want sore or ignore on face to face. But one thing keep in mind "Don't loose good human with that sarcastic face".

 

Dog Fight

Dear Diary

I saw the ferocious dog fight in evening. It was fun to watch. It just happened instantly when I was walking with my junior reverend Able Sebastian(ha..ha...). So, I wanted to capture the moment and it took more than 4 seconds to take out my phone cum camera and another 10 seconds in opening the application camera.

The moment was almost gone. I was able to take some part of the fight. Bite me, I couldn't even zoom it while recording. I had a moment and I was snapped by the uncanny gesture of my find. A thought tickled me that why can't we have the quick application on handy stuff say phone to open with an instinct. You know, like our eyes act involuntarily, when we are hovered around the something or some stuff coming from nowhere and you react instantly.

That what I am talking about. You don't want to miss a uncalled moment. It is so natural and spontaneous. That's the beauty about it. I hope one day we will have that power technology. But I am also bit vexed about the overuse of this technology.

With this Instant recording techniques we will be consumed by just watching those past moments and we will end up doing nothing much later. It will be sheer waste of time and reminiscence of such event might reduce our efficiency and effort. We will be so much consummated in past them and we will do nothing much substantial.

It's up to every individual to make them aware of all pros and cons of the technology. In fact there will be special classes in school curriculum about the "Conscience & Morality in technology". It will encourage student to think out of box rather than be in the mundane. The moral and ethics will be determined use and misuse of the technology. It will be so sprawling and sporadic that people will not even realise.

Any ways that was fun to think in such way. I will upload the video soon. In a meantime enjoy and laugh.
 

Courage

10th January,2013
20:55

Hey Diary

What is courage? It is a mental side effect, a pseudo force which drives your to other state. A self man is made. The manifestation of the new coming and you are in control. I despise the shivering of the veins which rebuke me back. Then you live in seclusion for while and you tries to redeem. Indeed you jitter, but when a man has hold of himself he knows where the things are running and knows when to fold.

Courage doesn't seek any sense of gratification. It makes you believe in your identity. The idiosyncrasy of the life is plain and simple. A symphony that take you to one source. That is courage. I seen enough of stratagem and strategy which inhibit the man inside. Now it not going to work against me because I know the true virtue of veracity.

Every minutes count, and I will live that with courage. It shall never get dimmer. It will always stay with me. I will free flow no matter how medieval it gets. I shall not break and swap away all the bleakness from inside.

The mental agony has always dreaded me. I shall disrupt this jinx. It's not about merely trying but by magnifying the ineptness which was still unbeknownst to me. Now I no longer dwell about all the insipid vocation. It gives me enough space and time to incessantly.

Like all the dime shackles and crumbles up that make meaningless for a while, but when you lost in some ineffable thought, though it may be strange to the world, despite that you know that uncanny mysticism, for which you run. That gives you strength to stand and fight back.  

The State of being Father

8th January,2013
15:00

Hello Diary

How that feels to be a father? An abrupt inquisition had occurred to me. There is some inexplicable urgency develops, the moistness maroons all stiffness of the man. It's special relationship and unreplaceable. It binds you with all uncanny epiphany. A reminder an alarm which ticks every moments which checks you every time. A path of righteousness involuntary comes within you. A true self evolves and you are more than a man. A true hero.

The children are more than assets- a soul from your soul. You will do everything to protects the soul from the world. You will start doing the things which you haven't done before. You will say the things which you haven't said before. No matter how tough you are, you will eventually cry when your child is born. A tear of joy will flow and your glows more than ever. 

You will stand for him. You will make him what you couldn't be. Your child will be the constant reminder of your past and you will give your best to make him best.

Once William Wordsworth said "A child is a father of a man". Truly said. A responsibility comes to a man when he grabs his child for the first time in his arms. That's a time onwards you can't stumble, from that time onwards you can't afford to fumble. A poignant anxiety which reflexes and outnumbers the grief inside you. That's called "Child" A child is also constant reminder that there is a hope in the world.

You might find this silly right now and it's obvious it will be for now because you are a student only doing final year graduation. Still lot of time left for you. Let's calculate how long?  Then after all your introspection you suddenly realise. Oh fuck! That's just 6 year from now when you might get married. Oh my god! I can't feel myself, that's very less time. I haven't lived my life. Till then I lived the life of vagabond, then suddenly I will have the responsibility to look after another person. You question yourself that "Am I capable of doing that?" Huh!!

Friends I will say to you that do not blow your whistle in vacuum. Nobody will listen. It's you and only you who can perform in your behalf. Nobody will fuck for you, because it's your fucking matter. You plan from now onwards and execute them quick. Make yourself eligible, work hard then only you will be able to squeeze the juice from the fruits. Pressing the panic button not going to help.

Store your calmness and excrete your qualm. Get the best education as possible to secure yourself first. This is great psychological factor in order to keep running you forward. Gain the thing which was unbeknownst to you then. Time to thrive on your knowledge and experience. Every single minutes count, make most from it. Make yourself presentable, be great sociable person learn good things from every source. Loose your egotist as it will block your intelligence, never let it happens to you. You got just few more years. Remember that what your parents your grandparents did for you. Take that inspiration and proceed to make your life heaven. A good human being.

 

Synopsis Report and vive la France

7th January
22:25

Bonjour Monsieur

I found something new in college. A student from France coming to Kannur for study exchange program. His name is Pierig Gallou. We all played football and what we saw a European blood running the down the veins of the football field like a professional footballer. He was passing smartly, showing right composure and agility. It was nice experience. I did the goal keeping and was able to see the ball like a hawk poaches the snake.

We are doing the research methodology on the topic "To comprehend the food habits of the students in men's hostel and reducing the wastage" And here it is:

Introduction

Food is vital part for proper functioning of the human body. Food provides:

·         Nutrients

·         Minerals

·         Energy

So it becomes imperative for our life. Hence, it’s our prerogative to eat right quality food. At the same time we should reduce the incessant food wastage. Thus it’s our responsibility because still in India people below poverty line don’t even get one meal in a day.

We can estimate the wastage of money as it is directly correlated to the wastage of food. The price rise have struck the Indian economy very hard and it is also depriving our basic needs. So a small measure like this can create a big impact on the society and to the whole country.

It’s time to get serious about this matter. The candid review of the person is also required for the same. We being the part of the men’s hostel and we know the situation over here. It’s a matter of time and real data which will elucidate the food factor. It is a microeconomics study and hopefully it will give the non-bias conclusion.

 

Objective:

·         To understand the food habits of the student

·         Analysing the quality and quantity of the food

Statement of the study:

Comprehending the food habits of the student in men’s hostel and finding the wastage of the food.

 

Scope:

Doing project within the men’s hostel

 

Significance:

·         Food habits

·         Like and Dislike of the food by the student

·         Sorting out the food from the option

·         Preferences of the meal

·         Reducing the food wastages

·         Students from diverse culture and background like north, south, eastern, western parts of India.

·         Analysing quality and quantity of food.

Method:

·         Daily visual observation

·         Questioners

·         Survey

 

Possible findings:

·         Wastage

·         Money expenditure

·         Average consumption

·         Preferences of meal

 

General Idea:

·         The student wake up late morning. Thus they skip the breakfast in order to attend the class on time (9:00 AM).

·         Lunch time is busiest time and almost everyone take food. During weekends the food get wasted as many student either out of hostel or out of city.

·         Dinner is the also busier time, especially on Sunday.

 

 

The Confession

6th January,2014
17:30

Hey Diary,

I came back today morning to Kannur. I read the Bhagvad Gita till 200 pages. Yet to read more and more. Long way to go still. When you read just thought invoking and in sighting sacrosanct scripture, one really get lost in them. It's obvious that the self-expectation too rise up every time when one climb to high. The man self-esteem rises up each time. The primary objective is to maintain for prolonged period of time and incessant flow towards destination. Then the sudden serendipity can change the life on its own. That's fate that's your destiny.

I am telling you with utmost dismay and incredulous feeling that I feel horrible human being today. It wasn't that I expected to be. I did get shaken out by any capricious or even precarious situation. The sad part is that it take long time to recover that trauma of tyranny to innocent mind. The mind which I endeavour for, the mind which I pledge to carry forward, the mind which flow smoothly. The subject is your own soul. I am not telling you to be egoist, or doing anything for your own personal gratification or even vendetta against the devil inside. It is one thing and foremost just one thing that never let the human spirit down the aisle of veracity. You stand for something, you are more than a thing, never let any imaginative wind blow your spirit.

I came here to make confession and it's lifting my spirit now. I am not here to justify my deeds or I don't promise about my tenacity of my morality, but one thing for sure that I will never let this man fall down towards the dungeons. I will fight back. I will run again towards a point of prudent. And again I will reach the pinnacle of the aisle.

11th Hour

4th January, 2013
00:30 Indian Standard Time

Dear Diary

Life is so less when you are not frivolous. Mistake is not a tragedy where you keep hovering your mind for prolonged time. You can't even focus on the next part. You get loosen and loosen, then loosing and loosing, then lousy and lousy. Then the end. Then after few hours or days you wonder that why??? why the hell I did that huh...

You keep asking and asking yourself and get trapped in another time warp of procrastination. You unwantedly loose other things too. Then few days later you say that " I am sick of all these shit. I can't do anymore. I want to get over this. But I can't. It's still sailing me back to the same silly shore."

This keeps on going and there is no ending. Then after few years your mind cannot take this anymore. You naturally inhibit the flow of that same obstructing stuff. Our mind has tendency to built a defence mechanism to tackle any negativity. Compromise is just one of the defensive tool. The other is ostracizing the thought flow.

In every human being life there comes a time, we call rapture or epiphany. This is a time when a person realizes that what is right and what is wrong. He or She sees thing crystal clear. There is no illusion. A person becomes more truthful and sagacious. It comes with an experience. In general old age is such time period.

So, I urge all my readers to know the truth of your life. Search and explore, you will discover one day. Don't delay. Mistakes bound to happen, learn from it and take this into your deep core of your soul. It's a hue which plays huge role in carving you as a human. Again I say don't be late to realize when you lying on the bed counting at your 11th hour. And suddenly you self-pity for missing the harms and charms of life-cycle.

Phelgm of Optimistic

2nd January,2013
18:35

Dear Diary

Here I am at Delhi. Technically at Delhi NCR. It's second day of this year and thus brought another gloominess. Trust is one of the most important factor of human connectivity. When it breaks so the human heart too. Overcoming this big setback can be time taking. But stand up sooner.

"Pessimist sees obstacles in every opportunity and Optimist sees opportunity in every problem".
Winston Churchill

Ponder over this quote. Be an Optimist. Maybe this trust was an opportunity for deeply comprehending the human nature. I can't get louder or shrill for long period. That's not me. Maybe I am phlegmatic. It preserve my sagaciousness. It's time to apply them in real life. In a meantime, it makes me more cynical. Maybe that becoming my virtue. Makes me more alert. I may forgive but I will never forget. It's not that I will retaliate and waste my energy, or maybe I am afraid. But I can shift my energy in something more substantial. To be better human being. Some people are mode of digression. So avoid them. Don't you ever think about the matter.

Look at the priority of your life. Don't get lost in overwhelming ocean of life. Learn to swim and face the wave and tide with your mettle heart.  I will always seek the scope of optimism and apply myself. That's the spirit that's life!!